Smelling The Roses

By guest blogger Dean Shrock, Ph.D.

Probably all of us have heard the admonition, “You’ve got to stop and smell the roses.” I’ve found that people seemingly understand the value of taking more time for the things they enjoy, but they seldom do it. They’re too busy. So, I’m going to give you a reason to take this common sense adage much more seriously.

I served as Director of Mind Body Medicine for a physician management group of 40 cancer centers. For years I taught cancer patients and their families a wellness program and the importance of having a “will to live.” As a result, I found that these patients lived longer than a control group of patients receiving only conventional medical treatments (chemotherapy, radiation, or surgery).

This shouldn’t be so surprising. We have long understood the reasonableness of the statement, “When you’re busy doing what you like to do, you tend to forget your aches and pains.” Stopping to smell the roses clearly impacts your quality of life. But now research supports that this is no longer optional. It’s mandatory. Doing more of what you truly love (and doing less of what doesn’t bring you joy and satisfaction) literally can add life to your years and years to your life.

When I asked patients to list how they actually spend their time and to list how they’d like to spend their time, these lists were almost always very different. What’s wrong with this picture? What’s crazy is that people seemed to need permission to finally take time for themselves.

Can you imagine going to the doctor, and the doctor wrote you a prescription to go fishing or whatever brought you the greatest joy and meaning in your life? That’s what we did with these patients. And they loved it! And they lived longer!

Now I’d like to give you a recommendation for living with cancer. Ask yourself, “How do you want to spend the time you have left—whether that’s months or years?” Do you want to withdraw in fear? Or do you want to use whatever time you have left to do what you love most? That was the primary message of my first book, Doctor’s Orders: Go Fishing—Do what brings you the greatest joy and meaning in your life. Live like you’re going to life. You’ve simply got to create a better balance in your life between doing all the things you think you “should” do and the things you “want “ to do. This is how to not only live with cancer (get well), but how to stay well.

I found consistently that the three most important things in people’s lives were their spiritual beliefs, family, and friends. So, here’s your prescription: Doctor’s orders—You have to spend at least one hour daily pursuing your spiritual beliefs, spending meaningful time with family and friends, and bringing more joy into your life. Please take this advise and understand that joy is very good medicine. Go fishing!

Dean Shrock, Ph.D. is the bestselling author of Doctor’s Orders: Go Fishing, Why Love Heals, and Living and Thriving: A Mind-Body-Spirit Program for Wellness. He also is co-author of the chapter on Mind-Body Medicine in Dr. Andrew Weil’s 2009 text, Integrative Oncology.

www.DeanShrock.com