Hypnosis Plus Sex Counseling – A Path to Greater Sexual Enjoyment

By Guest Blogger – Amy Marsh, EdD, DHS, ACS, CH

If you can imagine a great sex life, it’s easier to have one!

The problem is, many people cannot imagine what a great sex life would feel or look like. They may be overwhelmed by work, family responsibilities, money problems and other stresses of modern living. They may have desires they fear their partner will never approve. They may struggle with gender image and expression or feel turmoil over sexual preferences and fantasies. They may feel disconnected from their bodies – feeling “dead below the neck” – and their erotic nature is a mystery they cannot seem to solve. Such people may experience some form of sexual dysfunction, and when that happens, they may then begin to turn away from intimacy.

Such people often talk themselves into greater states of worry and negativity about sex. We have all heard about or known men with “performance anxiety” – acute worry about ability to get and keep an erection. Performance anxiety is real – overstimulation of the “flight, fright, or freeze” response of the Sympathetic nervous system has a negative effects on our external genitals, making it harder for the penis and the clitoris to become erect. In order to function and experience sexual pleasure, we need the Parasympathetic (“rest and digest”) and Sympathetic nervous systems to act in unison, balancing each other.

Some women who experience painful intercourse (e.g., vulvodynia and vaginismus), low libido, and orgasm difficulties can be helped with a combination of sex counseling and hypnosis. The mantra of hypnosis is “relax, relax!” You can bet that the Parasympathetic nervous system hears and responds! But this is only the beginning of the many benefits of skillful, sexological hypnosis. A person in any depth of trance has greater access to his or her intuition and experiences a greater state of suggestibility. With hypnosis, we can explore and address problems with body image, sexual self-esteem, desire, sexual trauma, barriers to orgasm and pleasure, and even help to banish or manage sexual dysfunction.

Through the relaxation of hypnosis, women are encouraged to imagine themselves as sexually healthy, fully functioning individuals who have deserve to experience sexual pleasure and fulfillment. They can break down barriers that make them feel stuck in old patterns, and overcome the effects of negative self-talk and feelings of failure. And they get to “rehearse” positive sexual experiences – imagining themselves in successful sexual scenarios. And they get many positive suggestions to support them on their path to sexual health and intimacy.

Hypnosis goes in and out of fashion. Many people have odd ideas about it from Hollywood movies. But medical and mental health researchers have studied it for decades and many clinicians continue to use it effectively. Numerous studies in peer-reviewed journals affirm the efficacy of hypnosis in everything from erectile dysfunction and vaginismus to its uses in childbirth, pain control, and more. As a complementary modality, hypnosis is an excellent tool and can be used in conjunction with medical treatment and mental health care. However, new clients should always be advised to get medical check-ups, and to inform doctors and mental health providers of their visits to consulting hypnotists or hypnotherapists.

As a clinical sexologist and AASECT certified sex counselor (who is also a certified hypnotist), my office is a “shame-free zone.” Hypnotized or not, my clients also feel relieved and relaxed when they discover they can talk about anything and everything with me. No topic is off limits. This freedom to speak in a sex-positive, nonjudgmental setting about topics which have felt taboo is beneficial in and of itself.  And I often operate as a sexuality resource person, suggesting books, techniques, or simply new ways of thinking about sexuality – whatever each client needs.

But without the ability to offer hypnosis to those clients who want it, my work would be very different. When my clients release worry, shame, lack of desire, and sexual hang-ups through hypnosis, they are better able to access self-healing processes of imagination, intuition, and positive suggestion. Then it’s a lot easier to imagine – and create – a great sex life.

Dr. Amy Marsh loves to talk and write about sex! And she loves to do and teach hypnosis. She’s a board certified clinical sexologist, a certified hypnotist, and a certified sex counselor through the American Association of Sex Educators, Counselors, and Therapists. She teaches the 150-hour Intimate Hypnosis course through the Institute for Advanced Study of Human Sexuality in San Francisco, and offers adult sex education online through Creative Sexuality and Sex Coach U. Her written work has appeared in Jezebel, Carnal Nation, Your Tango, and Good Therapy. She is published in the Electronic Journal of Human Sexuality. Dr. Marsh has also appeared on Good Morning America, Tyra Banks, and National Geographic Taboo, commenting on Objectum Sexuality. Her essay, “Kid Chrysalis,” was just published in Rachel Pepper’s new anthology, “Transitions of the Heart – Stories of Love, Struggle and Acceptance by Mothers of Transgender and Gender Variant Children. Dr. Marsh is the mother of two. She has a private practice in the San Francisco Bay Area.

Share Your Comments: